Many miles away from the cottage which Teddy had taken over from Snowball who had taken it over from a certain rabbit who was now trekking up a huge snowy mounain. Ice clung to her whiskers and the wind howled around her. There was no sign of anything except for fields of white. So much white. So much snow. So much freezing. So much desolation.
An annoying little Angelica came hopping up the slope behind her, whining. "Why are we up here? What are we doing? I want to go home!"
"I have to go to the bathroom!" said Savio.
"I want a snack," put in Spike.
I have a whole list of things I want right now... thought Jacob, who was pulling, up the mountain, the cart which Spike was sitting on.
"Whoever doesn't want to stick with me to the end of this journey can leave now!" exclaimed Yvonne. She paused dramatically.
Everyone sat there, staring at her.
She continued back up into the mountain until she had come to a cave. "At last," she mumbled to herself. "The Cavern of Kumputarz!"
She hopped down a passageway and came into a well lit and well heated office room, lined with computers. She sat down at one of this.
"What are you doing?" whined Angelica.
"Hacking into the blog!" replied Yvonne. "I shall have power over my blog once again!"
Spike fainted at the use of the word "blog".
Jacob, who was standing in the doorway with the cart still attached to him, did not say anything. But he was wondering why Yvonne had to hack into the blog when she was already apparently in the blog, and how does all this even work? He could have asked these things, but he thought it would have been rude.
Angelica didn't care about being rude. She said, with an extremely ugly look on her face, "What? Why do you have to do that since you're obviously using the blog right now?"
Spike fainted more.
Yvonne did not move and did not speak for a while. In her head she was wresting with the question of one of her greatest weaknesses: that of dumbly going through a lot of effort to do something which either didn't have to be done or which could have been done simply. She came to the conclusion that, rather than trying to fix this problem of hers at the moment, she would just take out her irritation by picking Angelica up and flinging her off the mountain.
Angelica screamed for a long time. But she lived. No one ever dies in these sorts of blogs.
"Snowball, you're pretty lousy at running this business," said Yvonne.
At first Snowball did not reply. He was busy focusing intensely on his miniature macaroni palace. He delicated placed another piece of macaroni on top of it.
He was still too lost in his project to hear.
Yvonne's horse, Jacob, walked into the house. He was small enough to fit. He ate Snowball's macaroni palace.
"Seriously, man, you got some nerve!" exclaimed Snowball.
Jacob snorted macaroni all over Snowball.
"SNOWBALL!" screamed Yvonne. Snowball jumped up and hit the ceiling.
"What? Who's that? Who's dere?" asked Snowball.
"The rabbit who owns this house," answered Yvonne. "Anyway, you are not running this business properly..."
"No, you don't do that no more, dat ownin' this house thing," said Snowball. "All mine now, and I run dis business just like I like to."
"Then I quit!" exclaimed Yvonne.
Snowball gasped. "You can't do dat!"
"I just did!"
"Well, you really can't, because I fire you!"
Yvonne walked out the door. Jacob followed her, still munching on macaroni. She hooked him up to a cart. "We're going on an adventure, Jacob!" she said.
Angelica came out of the house, where she had been rather poorly pretending to be working at her school. Savio followed her, still munching on her homework. Yvonne grabbed them both and dropped them in the cart.
"What are you doing to me?" whined Angelica. Savio whined, too, though he didn't know why.
"Instead of me just telling you stories all the time, we're going to live stories! We're gonna see them ourselves! Experience them!" said Yvonne.
"You're a nut!" screamed Angelica.
"Maybe, but you're dramatic," said Yvonne. "You're also not leaving, because I just strapped you to your seat."
Spike hopped out of the house, still munching on a banana. "Snowball's brooding in there, and lamenting about how he's been betrayed or something. What did you do? What are you doing?"
"We're going places!" said Yvonne, and with that, she swept him up onto the cart next to her.
"Why can't I drive?" asked Spike.
"Because you're eating a banana," replied Yvonne, as if that made perfect sense.
Jacob, who could talk, though he preferred not to, snorted and thought, Great, now I've gotta work. Just a couple minutes ago I was living a life of luxury, eating macaroni palaces and all...
HEY! this is yvonne
Your narrator... sort of.