Cake

There was no sign of Yvonne anywhere. Angelica, with the help of Savio, looked in all twenty-five of Yvonne's secret offices, and even discovered a secret underground tunnel, but Yvonne was not there. They looked under the sofa. Not there. They looked inside the television. Not there. They looked in each and every book in the house. Not in any of them, nor under them, either. 

Angelica and Savio had just about given up on their search when a small, fluffy white rabbit hopped into the house as if he owned the place. 

"Hi dere! I'm back for a visit!" said Snowball. "Hey, you know, I love what ya done wid da place. Dat dinosaur skeleton out dere is a real nice touch."

"Not you again!" exclaimed Angelica. Savio said nothing. He sat staring and panting, and that said it all. 

"What? You got a problem with me? 'Cause I don't got a problem with me," said Snowball. "This Story Tuesday or something? No, gotta think of a better name than that, you know. Anyway, you want a story? You can't have one. 'Cause I don't have one."

"Then at least tell us where Yvonne is," grumbled Angelica. 

"Oh yeah? Nah, dat's okay. I'll pass," he said, looking through the refrigerator. Then he suddenly screamed, "Instead I'll tell you a story!" and he threw himself on the sofa so that it slid at least five feet back. Angelica looked perplexed or, perhaps, entirely bewildered. Snowball relished in that sort of look, which he was well acquainted with.

"You! Dog! Fan me!" demanded Snowball. Savio obeyed as best he could, picking up a leaf in his teeth and fanning Snowball with it. The action really did nothing, but Snowball liked to see other creatures adoring him.

"So..." began Snowball...

"There was once this perfect little rabbit. A little, fluffy white rabbit, with the biggest, most perfect set of biggest blue perfect eyes ever. Perfect little bunny. Cutest thing ever! Who couldn't love him? And he just loved everybody, too! Did I tell you he was perfect? He always did his chores. He always did his homework. He never lied. He never yelled at anybody. He always donated to orphans and puppies and kittens and all that... stuff.

He had perfect grades at school. Don't forget he was perfect. But no one actually did love him, although it was nearly impossible not to love him. His teachers were mean to him. His own family was mean to him! When he had grown up, his mommy and daddy kicked him out of the house!

He wandered the streets alone, seeing all da injustice around him, weeping at it... and one day, BOOM! He became a superhero! 'Cause he went to da store and got a superhero costume and discovered he could fly. Okay, well, he had to be wearing that costume to fly, and dat don't make much sense and I don't got an explanation for it other than... ALIENS!"

Just then a rabbit in a suit (and a terribly unfashionable tie) came hopping into the house, bearing a cake with little green alien figurines on it. "Aliens? Did someone say aliens!?" exclaimed the rabbit. An ID card clipped to the breastpocket of his suit said that he was Agent Rabbit Mulder of the IBBI (Imperial Bureau of Bunny Investigation). 

No one had a chance to say anything else before a grumbling, scowling rabbit with little spectacles came strutting in. "I'd like to speak to your manager!" she demanded. Angelica squealed with delight when she recognized her as Harriet Hoppington. But after that yet more rabbits came piling in through the door: cowbunnies, mayors, archaeologists, historians, dinosaur geneticists... even Emperor Bunzees himself showed up!

"What's going on?" yelled Angelica. The little book-filled house had become crammed full of rabbits. 

"I'm just in it for da cake!" said Snowball, taking a plate of cake from someone's paws and eating the entire thing.

"This is why Yvonne is never here this time of year," said a rabbit wearing a blue hoodie. He looked around at the huge crowd. 

"What?" asked Angelica, more bewildered than ever before.

"Well, you know, most of the rabbit empire shows up at Yvonne's house this time of here, and she always evacuates right before we come flooding in," explained the rabbit in the blue hoodie. He put on a name tag which read "Spike". 

"Party!" panted Savio.

Thus, at least a third of the entire rabbit planet had a party for the entirety of that week and wrecked Yvonne's home. But fortunately Spike politely left a piece of cake in the fridge for her. An old, stale piece of cake, partly eaten by Snowball, but it's the thought that counts.

And Angelica never made sense of any of the events of that week, but at least she got to eat more cake than she probably should have.